may i never find myself yawning at life. - toyohiko kagawa

ha!

Tue, 17 Nov 2009 19:31:42 GMT

it's been forever since i've posted.

polyamory views have changed... that is funny.

been riding my bike all the time. that's good.

i'm happy. very very happy.

can't get complacent!!!

Mon, 06 Apr 2009 15:56:54 GMT

wow. i need to slowwwwwww it down.
been meeting guys and hanging out and going out and dancing and i need a break.

some things i realized lately:

- i am bad at chess.

- changing a flat tire is not that hard

- i cannot be polyamorous. sorry, i can't. i am ALL for everyone else doing it, being with who they wanna be with, and living life on their own terms, but i personally can't. at least i don't think so right now.

- i have been too preoccupied with other people. i need to re-focus on myself.

having said all that, i'm fixing my bike this week. gonna try to ride it to work as much as i can. also, i'm not going to drink this month. i did it last year for a while and i'm gonna do it again. not like i've been drinking alot, but i think it will help clear my head.
finally, on hiatus from the smooching. taaaaking a break.

in other news, work still pays shit, but i love my job. go figure.
i'm almost done with sexual assault counselor training.
i'm at the library.

that's all.

also

Fri, 31 Oct 2008 16:22:09 GMT

i love the fact that the middle aged black woman i work with and me are always quoting "crazy subway lady" during the day.

i just called her and she said "i'm pressing charges". awesomeeeeeeeeeeeeee :)

happy halloween!

Thu, 30 Oct 2008 20:06:00 GMT

i'm so glad i'm not pregnant.

MySpaceBulletins

Tue, 09 Sep 2008 05:53:31 GMT

My current life in 90 questions

TAKE THIS SURVEY!

Take this survey

1. What was the highlight of your week?
having visitors over my apartment
2. Whose car were you in last?
my mom's
3. When is the next time you will kiss someone?
probably this week
4. What color shirt are you wearing?
brown tshirt grey sweater
5. How long is your hair?
it's like shoulder length now, crazy how fast it grew
6. Are you good looking?
i'd say so
7. Last movie you watched?
that ricky bobby movie... eh
8. Who were you with?
myself
9. Last thing you ate?
animal crackers
10. Last thing you drank?
water
11. When was the last time you had your heart broken?
like 2 years ago? i dunno
12. Who came over last?
albert and gena!
13. Are you happy right now?
yeah!
14. What did you say last?
"bye"
15. Where is your phone?
on the desk
16. What color are your eyes?
brown
17. Are you left-handed?
no
18. Spell your name without vowels:
alc
19. Do you have any pets?
no but trena has cats!
20. Favorite Vacation?
anywhere really... visiting friends
21. What do you dislike currently?
only having one day off a week, and it's not even the whole day
22. What are you listening to?
nothing
23. If you could have one thing right now what would it be?
a blanket
24. What is your favorite scent?
a sweaty man haha kidding but not really. maybe this shampoo i have?
25. Who makes you happiest?
being with family and friends and spooning/kissing is nice too
26. What were you doing at midnight last night?
just crawled into bed
27. When is your birthday?
october 23rd 1985
28. Who has the same phone as you?
no one
29. Last time you went swimming in a pool?
this summer some time
30. Do you read your horoscope?
pretty much never
31. Where was the last place you bought something?
family dollar
32. How do you feel about your hair right now?
good. i love my hair
33. Do you bite your nails?
about every two weeks or so i bite them all off
34. Do you have any expensive jewelery?
i don't think so
35. Do you have any expensive jewelery?
but wait i think i do, gifts from my mama
36. Myspace or facebook?
both
37. How fast have you driven a car?
not very fast
38. Have you ever smoked?
yep
39. What was or is your favorite subject in school?
gender shit
40. Do you have Verizon?
no
41. What type of boy or girl do you usually fall for?
scruffy
42. Do you have any hidden talents?
i'm really awesome
43. Favorite Song?
no clue
44. Do you like to sing at all?
yeah
45. Dream Job?
currently i want to do options counseling at planned parenthood...
46. Where does most of your family live?
pittsburgh
47. Are you an only child or do you have siblings?
sibs
48. Would you consider yourself to be spoiled?
nope
49. What was the first thing you thought when you woke up?
wow it's early why am i up today since i'm off
50. Do you drink?
ya
51. Know any other languages?
mas o menos
52. Ever write a coded message?
ya
53. Have you ever been IN a wedding?
yes
54. Do you have any children?
hell naw
55. Did you take a nap today?
yeah two
56. Who has the same birthday as you?
brad coups and like 18 other people
57. Ever met anyone famous before?
i don't think so who cares
58. Do you want to be famous one day?
no
59. Any Pet Peeves?
not using turn signals
60. Are you multitasking right now?
no i'm trying to stay awake
61. Do you like Britany Spears?
no
62. What is your least favorite chore?
used to be doing dishes but i don't actually hate it that much
63. Last place you drove your car?
trena's street then it got TOTALED
64. Ever been out of the country?
yeah! canada, china, ireland, and venezuela
65. Where were you born?
sewickley
66. Could you handle being in the military?
don't join the military
67. What is your average cell phone bill?
40
68. Who are you thinking about right now?
i'm tired
69. When was the last time you laughed REALLY hard?
today
70. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
like 7
71. Are your toes always painted?
no but if they are they stay the same color for about a year
72. How many piercings do you have?
two
73. What are you doing today?
working until 7am, going home and taking a nap, working planned parenthood 11am - 7pm, movietime
74. Have you ever been gambling?
no dumb
75. When is the last time you updated your page?
no clue
76. Do you like rollercoasters?
yesssssssss
77. Have you ever been to disneyland or world?
no i don't want to either
78. Do you have a favorite cartoon character?
jem
79. Last thing you cooked?
broccoli, cheddar and rice
80. How's the weather?
fine
81. Do you e-mail?
uh huh
82. What's the stupidest thing you ever did with your cell phone?
forgot the charger
83. Last time you were sick?
like a year ago or something
84. What states have you lived in?
PA
85. Do you wish you could move?
i will move in a year
86. Do you take all the QuizPox.com quizzes?
no
87. What is your dream car?
amc eagle
88. Have you ever wanted someone you cant have?
ya
89. If you could be anywhere right now where would it be?
in my bed
90. Are you happy with your life?
yesssssss

CLICK HERE TO TAKE THIS SURVEY!

More MySpace Surveys | Tired of MySpace?

feminists have better sex... or do they?!?!?!?

Tue, 09 Sep 2008 05:27:49 GMT

the jury is still out.

in other news, my apartment rules. i've already had many visitors over:
albert and gena
jared
andrew
cortney and tom
gay neighbors from the second floor
my mama
christopher

my bed is in a castle-like area with windows and it's so cozy and great. i just throw up a curtain if i need privacy and it's all good.

what we still need:
-couch
-kitchen table
-comfy chair

i was gonna write more but i'm tired.

Sun, 10 Aug 2008 13:45:39 GMT

all in all, i would have to say this summer was not that awesome.

- i spent a month of my life working at this job that i hated and it was depressing me.
- re-connected (if you could call it that) with an ex and that was a bad idea, as it always is. that is officially done, we have absolutely nothing in common besides our past.
- tried to connect with another man, and we had our hits and misses, but ultimately it is not worth either of our time. we both want different things, and we are both way different people.
- didn't light off any fire works.
- didn't go to the cliffs.
- i hardly even drank haha
- i hardly ever rode my bike

ok well whatever. i feel as if ever since i've graduated i've been waiting to actually start living or something. it's tough to explain. i feel like i've been living in the future, with all these "when i BLANK then i'll BLANK" statements dictating my actions. fortunately, that feeling has shifted and things are looking up. i think the only thing i have left to do (at least majorly) is get an apartment. once i have a routine of when i wake up and where i go at night, i think i'll feel more comfortable and happy. only a couple more weeks till that :)

in other news, i love my jobs. here's the scoop:
1. womanspace east, inc. is a homeless shelter for women who are homeless for any reason, whether it be domestic violence, eviction, recovery, etc. my title there is RA like college, and i have house meetings every once in a while, but the populations are vastly different. yuppies in college, welfare recipients here. but i like it. the women are nice, their children are adorable, and i can bake brownies while i work! i'll be working there every saturday and sunday 3-11 and one day during the week. currently that weekday is 11pm-7am on monday nights, but i'm gonna be changing that soon or i'll die :)

2. planned parenthood downtown pgh is great as well. i register patients, and bring them back to my office (yes an OFFICE) to discuss health insurance options with them. i make sure that they are getting cheap/free family planning services and i get to interact with people daily. it rules. i wanna do counseling in the future at planned parenthood, so we shall see about that.
i work there tues-saturday. busyyyyy.

and since this is related to my jobs, i think i'm gonna quit birth control. only been on it for 2 months, but it's messing with me mood and emotions and dreams. AND i don't even need to be on it, cause uh, well, just cause. haha also with the amount of time i'll be working i won't be doing anything that could create a kid, so why take the pills? exactly.

in other news, everyone who rides the T is incredibly boring looking, and they also appear to be riding to their deaths.

and finally, one thing that will make me laugh no matter how many times i think about it:
on the sheets patients have to fill out when they come to planned parenthood, there is a spot for "highest grade achieved", which of course is to give us an indication of your level of education. WELL, someone the other day put "A+" in that spot. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

and, carl jung is super interesting. i'm reading man and his symbols now and it's fascinating.

and here's a funny story:

so friday night i came back from work at planned parenthood. i am currently staying at trena's apartment while her and cortney are in ireland, so i just hop on the T and ride it back to mt. lebanon. anyway, got home at like 5ish, and i was exhausted. i chowed on some food, and then layed on the couch to just vegggggggggggg out. i had been working every day since last thursday, but, welcome to my life since that's gonna be the norm from now on. ANWAY, so i was laying there and i could tell i was gonna fall asleep. i thought about it, and decided i didn't care because i was not going out that night anyway, and i would certainly wake up before the next day (saturday) since i had work at 8 in the morning.

so, i fall asleep. fast forward to me waking up and looking at the clock. i read "8:20" and i IMMEDIATELY jumped up and started to panic. i started to head for the bathroom to try to get ready in like 5 minutes, and then i realized that POSSIBLY it was still friday. well of course it was. i'm such a moron, i thought i had slept all through the night and it was the next day. well, after i calmed down i watched some bravo tv and set my alarm and went to bed for real. the end. i think it's funny.

Sun, 11 May 2008 06:26:52 GMT

*Inner Personality*
Body Expert
How long are your nails?:	not clawlike. every two weeks or so i bite them off
Do you have piercings?:	my ears. contemplating my nose...
Innie or outtie belly button?:	innie
Do you wear braces?:	i did for like a year and a half
Do you wear glasses?:	sometimes. either glasses or contacts.
What underwear do you prefer?:	hipster cotton kind
Do you shower daily?:	nope
Do you brush your teeth?:	yeahhhh
Do you wear deoderant?:	ya, but i am thinking about changing that.
Do you consider yourself pretty?:	yes.
Do you like your hair?:	yes! i'm so lucky, i have nice hair.
If you could, what would you change?:	ummm... honestly, just my weight. and i can change that.
What do people like most about your body?:	i dunno, my smile?
Are you healthy?:	sometimes. currently, no. it's a constant struggle.
Material Life
Where do you buy your clothes?:	uh, the thrift store. tj maxx. sometimes old navy but i feel guilty every time.
What shoes do you where?:	the same ones i've worn for the past few years
Do you come from money?:	hahahaha no. but my family always made sure we had everything we needed. and love :)
Do you need "stuff" to make you happy?:	nope
Who bought the car you own?:	my parents because they are amazingly nice and they didn't want me to have to bike in the snow.
Do you pay your bills?:	yeah.
Do you spend money wisely?:	sometimes. lately, no.
What do you spend on yourself in a month?:	eating out and drinks mostly.
Do you wear make-up every day?:	nope.
Do you eat out a lot?:	yeah :/
Do you give to charities?:	huh. i guess i don't.
Are you spoiled?:	nope.
Do you spoil others?:	eh, i dunno.
Morality In Question
Do you go out of the way to help others?:	i try to.
Do you judge people by their clothes?:	i try not to, but i'm only human. i try to recognize my judgement and then go beyond it.
Do you feel above others?:	no, but i think i come across that way sometimes. which is bad.
Do you look down on 'poor' people?:	nonono
Do you give to the homeless?:	yeah
Do you glare at people who look at you?:	eek, sometimes i do. i shouldn't do that.
Do you start arguments?:	sometimes... ah i need to chill out.
Are you a peace maker?:	depends.
Do you think most others are unintelligent?:	no.
Are you inlove with yourself?:	uh, no.
Do you try to change others?:	yes, and i shouldn't.
Do you commit revenge?:	i believe in justice.
Do you hold grudges?:	yes.
Do you go into rages?:	i don't think so.
Are you considerate of others feelings?:	most of the time.
If you could get away with it, would you...?
Steal a million dollars?:	nah
Beat someone you disliked up?:	yep.
Kill someone?:	if they deserved it.
Take hard-core drugs?:	no, ew.
Party all the time?:	no, ew.
Have sex with anyone?:	nah
Destroy someones reputation?:	no
Run someone over?:	if they deserved it.
Punch someone you were mad at?:	yeah, if they deserved it.
Rob a bank?:	no
Black-mail someone?:	no
Kidnap someone for ransom?:	no
Sexually abuse someone?:	FUCK NO
Run naked down the street?:	sure
Pee in a public place?:	ya
Throw food at someone you didn't know?:	that's not nice
Have sex in a public area?:	eh
Trash anothe'rs property?:	nah
Buy stolen property?:	nah
Graffiti someone's car?:	if they deserved it
Cheat on your spouse?:	no
Kill a nieghboor's pet?:	noooooo
Frame someone for a crime you commited?:	um, no
Light someone's house on fire?:	probably not.
Hypnatize a room of people?:	no. stupid.
Brain wash to have followers?:	haha what the hell? no.
Force another to do what you want?:	no.
Destroy a relationship to get your way?:	no
Hurt someone who loves you?:	no
True Self
Are you predictable?:	i would say yeah
Who do you love?:	a lot of people
Have you cried over a broken heart?:	of course. of course.
Do you make jokes about others?:	sometimes.
What clique might someone think you are?:	depends. sometimes i look like a scumbag, other times i probably look like a yuppie college kid. i HATE when people try to categorize me. ugh, i hate it.
Do you love life?:	yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
Will you protect a friend from the truth?:	i don't get this, but no
Who has broken your trust?:	hmmm... not too many people. only a couple, i'd say.
Whose trust have you broken?:	hopefully no one.
Do you like yourself?:	YES. i need to realize i'm actually a really cool woman.
What's your best trait?:	my humor? i dunno.
What's your worst trait?:	procrastination i guess
Do you gossip?:	try not too
Do you brag a lot?:	nope
What do you like, as....
IQ in someone you're attracted to?:	not a moron
Eye color?:	i don't care, but i do so love brown.
Hair Color?:	purple. kidding, i don't care. not particularly interested in the blondes, just from looking at past men in my life.
Body type?:	healthy
Personality in another?:	FUNNY funny funny. brilliant, caring, adventurous, passionate, feminist, funny, loving, clever, bold.
Smell on another?:	natural body odor, old spice, patchouli, unique
Alcoholic beverage?:	vodka, sierra nevada pale ale, ufo, oberon
Date spot?:	a park, the woods, drive in, air hockey table, roof
Facial feature on another?:	SMILE! get a grin going on.
Body part of another?:	back, inner arm
Worldly views of another?:	not ethnocentric, wants to travel, open minded
Religion of another?:	probably not catholic.
Edgucation of another?:	doesn't matter, just has to want to learn new things on some way.
Cleanliness of another?:	showers every once in a while, nothing too crazy.
Take this survey \| Find more surveys Bzoink - The Original Survey Site

damn

Sun, 11 May 2008 05:52:48 GMT

currently trying to finish my incomplete for PO 300 (research methods). i've had this incomplete for a year, i'm such a procrastinator. grades are due monday. i still have a couple other papers to write. this sucks.

so with all this work i still have to do, i decide to post.
it's been a while. what's new? a lot.

first of all, i lost almost 20 pounds around the beginning of march, and as of now i know i've gained back at least 8 of those. lack of eating right and exercise are the reasons, but i'm working on it. i've been so busy and stressed with school it's like i don't have time. but i know i should put my health first.

secondly, yeah i went to venezuela again. 10 whole days there by myself. well, technically i was with lalo and his family, but i went by myself, stayed in the airport overnight, flew to puerto ordaz, stayed with them, then flew back to caracas by myself. it was an amazing trip and i still can't believe i went. it's so strange, it's like lalo and i were dating for a month or so haha. but all that's done. we are so completely incompatible, but what a trip it was! :) i will definitely be visiting venezuela again, it's like i have family there now. and it improved my spanish a TON.

third, my hair is so flipping long now! i can put it in a ponytail and blowdry it and what not. the other day i got the itch to shave it again, but i will refrain for a while. i figure i'll probably do it after i have a kid, which will not be for a long ass time. like when i'm over the age of 30.

fourth, i'm going to ireland with trena and cortney in a week. this will be the first country i'm going to where i can actually speak the language.

fifth, been thinking alot about my future. i will be living at home until the spring, and then trena and i are moving (most likely to portland). before we go there, we might go to mexico and hang out for about a month. i would be so happy to do that! so right now i'm looking for a job in the burgh where i can work on women's issues. it's tough. worst case scenario is i get a shit job until spring and save my money, then get a job more aligned with my interests in portland, cause they have a ton of feminist organizing going on there. ultimately, i might go to grad school for women's studies. i just want to work on what i'm passionate about.

sixth, i'm listening to brand new right now and it's making me feel so nostalgic. reminds me of high school. which was 4 years ago. WOW.

seventh, i'm kind of getting bored with being single. it's been about 3 years now that i've been in solo status. whatever, it's not a big deal. i feel like pittsburgh will yield more opportunities than cleveland, and if not, no problem cause i'm peacing out in less than a year.

eighth, i'm actually going to miss cleveland. not gonna miss my school, but will miss my professors. i'm gonna miss a lot of great people from here, and it sucks cause i have recently met some new folks who rule. :(

ninth, pumped to be coming home. i am gonna take advantage of the fact i'll be living with my family for a while, because after this, it's for real i'm out. like forever. i'll be taking all my stuff and making my own life. also, i'm excited to get back in touch with people from the burgh area and hang out with them.

tenth, after i am done with my stuff for school, i am going out every night this week.

hmmm... i'm in a weird mood.

Wed, 02 Apr 2008 04:19:39 GMT

despair is a really good word for how i feel right now.

Mon, 31 Mar 2008 02:13:34 GMT

oh also i shaved my legs hahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

and i'm in love with mushrooms.

Mon, 31 Mar 2008 02:10:14 GMT

justtttttttttttt realized:

one of my goals is to make out in an art museum.

putting that plan into action NOW.

oh and another goal:

make out with someone i actually have an interest in. like to date. like for the long term. that'd be nice for a change!

also, MY FEET SMELL!
also, i'm graduating in a bit.
also, this summer is going to rule.
and finally,
all i did this weekend was watch my so-called life on youtube.

gnarly.

Mon, 17 Mar 2008 01:44:47 GMT

1. Do you still talk to the person you lost your virginity to?
yes!

2. What is the best thing about your current job?
the tabouli and my manager is the most laid back person i've ever known

3. Are you touchy feely?
not really. actually, i'd say no.

5. Are you Irish in any way?
no

6. Ever drink Jack Daniels?
i don't think so. don't like that stuff.

7. You and Jesus go out to dinner -- who pays?
i guess i'd pay cause he was cool

8. Pick one state in the U.S. to get rid of permanently?
texas. cause it rightfully belongs to mexico.

10. Favorite carnival food?
um, this is a drink but lemonade

11. Favorite food to eat when you're wasted?
anything that is a carb.

12. When was the last time you got a good workout?
too long ago, last week i think.

13. What were you doing at 11:59 pm on Friday night?
sitting on a stool at the davenport listening to some crappy band waiting for tim

14. Is your bedroom window open?
no

15. Who is your favorite person to have a serious conversation with?
lots of people: abbey, my mom, tim, trena, cortney, jenn, biz, alex, marie, erin

16. Describe what you're wearing in detail?
red sweatshirt gray sweatpants

17. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?
NO it makes me more comfortable

18. Do you remember the person you first kissed?
yes.

19. Have you ever kissed someone you weren't dating?
uh yeah. hasn't everyone? haha

23. Older than you?
oh yeah

24. Have you ever kissed someone you didn't like?
uh, i don't think so
29. Quote something from last night:
"i'd love to buy you a drink"
"um. you can buy me an iced tea"

31. How many guys have you cried over?
some

32. Random fact:
yo puedo hablar en espanol.

33. Who ended your last relationship? You, or your ex-partner?
me first, then i guess him. then a bunch of crap.
34. Have you ever been in love?
yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

35. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?
yeah

36. Honestly, do you like anybody?
i like a lot of people, but i'm not crushing on anyone. haha. crushing.

37. Flowers or chocolates?
SUNFLOWERS

38. With your boyfriend/girlfriend, a romantic night in or wild night out?
go out then come back in. that's fun

39. Kisses or hugs?
i just answered this.

40. Be called sexy or beautiful?
beautiful

41.How many guys/girls have met your parents?
a lot

43. Have you been heartbroken?
yeah duh
47. Do certain songs make you cry?
uh huh

49. Who was the last person you hugged?
jodie

50. Do you wish you could see somebody right this second?
yeah

Mon, 17 Mar 2008 01:12:41 GMT

so...

some updates:

went back to venezuela and it was amazing. i went by myselfffff! for 10 days! and hung out with lalo the whole time. we went to a karaoke bar, out to dinner, watched movies, etc. it was great. and when i left i was only a little bit sad but also happy. sounds corny, but i learned alot about myself, who i am, who i want to be, and who i want to be with.

graduating in 2 months. unbelievable and i'm so excited.

going to ireland with trena and cortney in may.

applying to a bunch of different programs.

i cleaned my room!

i bought my new favorite blanket the other day from the thrift store.

flight of the conchords is hilarious and jemaine is a hottie.

and i can't wait until summer. this summer i will: swim, light fireworks, go to rogers ohio, drink, go to shows, ride my bike!!!, jump off the cliffs, go exploring, camp, grow my hair, work, hopefully continue to escort in pittsburgh, organize with POG, go to the anarchist picnic, spend time with my family, smile, and hang out with my friends. it will be awesome.

and here's a survey:
SO FAR IN 2008:
1. Have you had a gf/bf?:
um, kind of? lalo called me his girlfriend in venezuela haha

2. Have you had your birthday?:
nope, i'll be 23 in october

3. Been to church?
nope!

4. Cried?
uh heck yes

5. Had someone close to you pass away?
no
6. Pulled an all nighter?:
not really. i've been really lazy

7. Drank starbucks?:
yes :( i know

8. Gone shopping?:
yeah

9. Gone to the movies?:
i don't think so! i haven't been to the movies in forever

10. Been to the beach?
yeahhhhhhhhhh! i actually have! santa fe, venezuela
11. Bought something for over $200?
plane tickets to and from puerto ordaz

12. Met someone new?
yes, a tonnn of new people

13. Been out of your home state?:
yep. i've been to like 8 places besides pennsylvania

14. Gone snowboarding?:
no. ew.

15. Slept in a friend's bed?
yes!!

16. Snuck someone over?
i don't think so.

17. Snuck out of your own house?
no that's dumb

18. Been in a bar?:
uh duh

19. Concert?:
yeah! a couple

19. Lied?
no, i don't think so

24. Things you've bought lately?:
sweater, legwarmers, scarf, from the thrift store

25. Person you last hugged?:
um, jodie?
26. Person to call you?
biz?

27. Last time you took a bubble bath?
like 2 years ago or something

28. When was the last time you felt stupid?
i dunno

29. When was the last time you walked/ran over a mile?:
like 2 weeks ago

30. Who was the last person who saw you cry?:
haha lalo

31. Deleted.

32. Who was the last person you watched a movie with?
trenaaaaa

33. Who was the last person you danced with?:
trena!

34. Who did you last yell at?
zak

35. Who last told you they loved you?
one of my residents

36. Who makes you smile most?
my friends, or myself haha

37. What are you listening to right now?
some tv program on tlc in the background

38. What did you do yesterday?:
i woke up late from tim's house, escorted with abbey at the center for women's health, ate lunch with our favorite professor, napped, then went on a bar crawl with erin and beki. oh, then i went to some dumb rugby party for like 10 minutes.

39. Have you ever been in a mosh-pit?
haha i guess

40. Hugs or kisses?:
hmmmm. i want both right now.

Wed, 13 Feb 2008 22:29:42 GMT

yay yay getting my life together yay:

-graduating in may
-hopefully working in pittsburgh this summer with an awesome program
-saving up money
-will be probably doing this other awesome program in caracas in the fall teaching english/learning more spanish (for 6 months)
-coming back to USA fluent in spanish (hopefully)
-getting some other job for a while, or americorps
-moving to portland with trena

oh and did i mention I'M GOING BACK TO VENEZUELA IN 8 DAYS?!?!?!
can'ttttttttttt wait.
soooooooooooooo excited.
get to practice my spanish and see my friends and hang out and get tan and eat arrepas and fried plantanes (plantaines?) and be happy :)

oh, and i'm losing weight still.
woooooooohoo! on track for may!

chao
te mando un besito,
alecia

Wed, 06 Feb 2008 19:44:39 GMT

sooooooooooo...

i just got a call from venezuela!!!!!

:) :) :)

Wed, 06 Feb 2008 05:35:44 GMT

finally getting back into the groove of working out/eating well. haven't gained any weight, so that's good. i swear, if i don't lose weight by venezuela, i'll scream. there's not way that's possible, though. tons of fruits/veggies, walking everyday + working out every other day.... something's gotta give.

anyway, i bought my ticket from caracas to puerto ordaz today. it's kind of official now. i'm going there. again.

this is insane.

in other news, all we talk about in my classes this semester is sex, so that's cool. went to a show on saturday to see my friend's band play, and i had a good time. i like doing things by myself. i've been working a TON to save up money. my room is semi-clean. i'm friends with my sister again! i miss my POG friends. i've just been so busy, i feel like i'm losing touch with a lot of people and i hope they don't hate me, not just POG people. it's difficult.

oh also, trena and i are moving to portland in a year and a half. so that will rule :)

i've been practicing my spanish alot. 16 days till venezuela...

good night. here's my day tomorrow:

630-2: work
2-330: read for class
330-445: class
5-6: help with interview
6-9: work out/eat/homework/do resume
9-1030: vagina monologue runthrough
SLEEEEEEEEEP!

bored

Sat, 02 Feb 2008 19:12:06 GMT

*Odd Facts about ME*
DO YOU SNORE?:	no
LOVER OR A FIGHTER?:	both
WHAT'S YOUR WORST FEAR?:	someone scaring me to death
AS A KID, WERE YOU A LEGO BUILDER?:	yeahhhhh! but not from boxes or whatever. we just had a gigantic tub of blocks
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF "REALITY TV"?:	sometimes i watch it. i know, that's bad
DO YOU CHEW ON YOUR STRAWS?:	uh heck yes. every single one.
WERE YOU A CUTE BABY?:	duh.
HOW IS THE SINGLE LIFE FOR YOU?:	how'd you know i was single? JERK! but it's actually awesome.
WHAT COLOR IS YOUR KEYBOARD?:	gray or grey.
DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?:	nah
HAVE YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMPED?:	nope
ANY SECRET TALENTS?:	not really.
WHAT'S YOUR IDEAL VACATION SPOT?:	santa fe, venezuela. no seriously. it's beautiful and cheap.
HAVE YOU EATEN SUSHI?:	yes
HAVE YOU SEEN THE MOVIE "DONNIE DARKO"?:	uh huh, like a million times. it's always a good one.
DO YOU GIVE A DARN ABOUT THE OZONE?:	oh i give more than a darn.
HOW MANY LICKS DOES IT TAKE TO GET TO THE CENTER OF A TOOTSIE POP?:	i don't know because i bite them.
CAN YOU SING THE ALPHABET BACKWARDS?:	no
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON AN AIRPLANE?:	a bunch of times
ARE SPEEDO'S HOT?:	no, but they wear them all the time in venezuela
WHAT'S YOUR STAND ON HUNTING?:	it's lame
IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE?:	probably not for a very long time
DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?:	yesssss
WHAT ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO?:	nothing
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID, "I LOVE YOU":	to my mama last night
IS TUPAC STILL ALIVE?:	haha no
DO YOU CRY AT WEDDINGS?:	not really
HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?:	i don't. i don't eat them.
ARE BLONDES DUMB?:	no.
WHERE DOES THE OTHER SOCK END UP?:	huh?!
WHAT TIME IS IT?:	2:04
DO YOU HAVE A NICKNAME?:	some, i guess
IS MCDONALD'S DISGUSTING?:	ya
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE IN A CAR?:	like an hour ago
DO YOU PREFER BATHS OR SHOWERS?:	shower
IS SANTA CLAUSE REAL?:	no
ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK?:	no
WHAT ARE YOU ADDICTED TO?:	currently, iced soy chai
CRUNCHY OR CREAMY PEANUT BUTTER?:	crunchy natural pb
HAVE YOU EVER RIDDEN IN AN AMBULANCE?:	ya
HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BRUSHED YOUR TEETH TODAY?:	once
IS DRUG FREE THE WAY TO BE?:	if you want
ARE YOU WEARING SOCKS?:	no
HAVE YOU EVER HITCH HIKED?:	not really, but i've gotten rides with strangers
WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES?:	brown
WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?:	uh... like last week?
DO YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE?:	YES!
WHOSE LIFE IS BETTER?:	mine
ARE YOU PSYCHIC?:	no
HAVE YOU READ "CATCHER IN THE RYE"?:	who hasn't
DO YOU PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS?:	not really
CAN YOU SKATEBOARD?:	eh
DO YOU LIKE CAMPING?:	sure
DO U SNORT WHEN U LAUGH?:	no
DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC?:	i guess
IS A DOG A MAN'S BEST FRIEND?:	or a woman's
YOU BELIEVE IN DIVORCE?:	i believe in doing what you need to do
CAN YOU DO THE MOONWALK?:	i guess
DOES YOUR MOM KNOW YOU HAVE A MYSPACE?:	haha oh god i hope not. i'd be grounded!
WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?:	cranberry juice
DO YOU WEAR NAILPOLISH?:	sometimes
DO YOU LIKE SOMEONE RIGHT NOW?:	yes
WHAT'S THE MOST ANNOYING TV COMMERCIAL?:	the one about "the magical amount" of nicotine
DO YOU SHOP AT AMERICAN EAGLE?:	no
FAVORITE BAND AT THE MOMENT?:	i don't know.
Take this survey \| Find more surveys Bzoink - The Original Survey Site

Mon, 28 Jan 2008 11:45:13 GMT

going back to venezuela february 21st - march 2nd...

wow.

bored

Fri, 18 Jan 2008 01:43:29 GMT

*Tried to make it a little different than the rest*
What kind of TV do you have?:	i dunno, but it's 13 inches
Does your dad have gray hair?:	nope
What do you think of your inlaws?:	i don't have any, except my sister in law. she's dumb.
Have you ever kissed your cousin?:	on the cheek haha
Are your feet cold right now?:	nope, pretty warm
Are you on your period?:	nooooooooooo yeehaw
What do you think of self proclaimed bitches?:	that's ok.
Do you hate people who can't spell?:	i don't hate them. lately i've been thinking that "correct" spelling is oppressive
Is anyone obsessed with you?:	probably everyone
Why is your best friend your best friend?:	i have a bunch of best friends.
Ever had sex in a school bathroom?:	nope
At what age did you feel grown up?:	like last week.
Ever been pregnant?:	haha no no no no no. no.
Do you think the whole idea of Santa Claus is creepy?:	nah, but i don't think i will have my kids believe in him
Are you an animal lover?:	yeah
Do you have more than one dresser in your room?:	i guess so
Do you do your own dishes?:	i only have like 2 dishes, but yeah
Does chocolate make you sick?:	no
Do you hate your significant other's ex's?:	i don't have a significant other, but if i did, i wouldn't hate their ex's.
Is it ok to live with your boyfriend or girlfriend before you get married?:	yeah
Do you think you're better than everyone else?:	haha no
How many people hate you?:	probably some
Are you wearing a bra?:	yeah
Would you ever consider becoming a polygamist?:	eh, probably not.
Was Hitler really that bad?:	YEAH.
If the world was overcome with zombies could you survive?:	probably
Are any of your enemies now your friends?:	uhhhhh... i think so. i can't think of you though right now.
Do you have cable?:	yeah
Do you think iPods are stupid?:	sure
What kind of computer do you have?:	dell
Are most surveys all the same?:	yeah
Do you like talking about sex or does it freak you out?:	i like talking about sex.
Which is more appealing: A family type life or one where you party all time:	i don't like to party really... but i guess a balance between them.
When you got to a store do you like looking at the baby clothes?:	no
How much of your life is ruled by the TV?:	it isn't ruled by the tv
Don't you just hate Hannah Montana?:	nah
Do court shows irritate you?:	no i kind of like them
Is 13 too young to be having sex?:	yeah
Do you even like myspace or do you just have one because everyone does?:	it is useful
What's one thing about the human race that drives you crazy?:	we don't have enough hair to keep warm in winter
Do you believe in the paranormal?:	sometimes
What do think about internet dating sites?:	i don't want to use one, but they're good for others i guess
Do you have a bad temper?:	no
Do you like putting little glittery things all over your myspace?:	hahahaha no
Do you care about other people's lives or do you just pretend to care?:	i do care
What is in your closet?:	some sweaters, some random crap, some towels... it's really cold in there
Are there any sex toys located in your home?:	nope
Do you have a blu ray player?:	i don't even know what that is
Where are your parents?:	in PA
Do you know anyone who has commited suicide?:	yeah
Are there any weapons in your home?:	yeah
Do you own your own car?:	i guess
Do your parents still buy you most of your stuff?Even food?:	no, but they try.
Any aliens living with you?:	haha no
I'm done.Are you happy?:	sure
Take this survey \| Find more surveys Bzoink - The Original Survey Site

Sat, 12 Jan 2008 05:37:30 GMT

i am feeling so strange but so happy.

i don't even know what to think.

perhas i should not really think at all... rationality is lame anyway.

:)

Sat, 22 Dec 2007 17:44:54 GMT

me 2 days ago: "there is NOTHING there. at all. i mean, really. nothing."

me this morning: i have no clue.

it's so totally annoying but also very predictable and true.
arghhhhhhh...

oh well, in other news. i listen to this song on repeat in the car as i drive.
and i sing it really loudly, over and over again.

Tilly & The Wall: I Always Knew

I've lived my life inside daydream lies,
imaginary friends that always knew, knew, one day I'd leave, leave, for good.
I'll give away this girl who tried to make you fall in love, uh huh
I'll give her to, to, you so keep her close, close to you.
So you won't forget about how she loved you so long ago once upon a time.
Now she has grown, grown up, and you can't take, take it back

A lullaby won't change my mind, and I won't ever go back to that.
I will stay true, true to this belief that we've changed for the best through this.

Separate the ones who know you
from the ones who couldn't bother to see you for all that you are.
And deep down I always knew all the times I thought that I loved you,
it was just an easy answer, It was make believe,
but I still believe that this heart, heart will learn to love.

um... FUCK YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Fri, 14 Dec 2007 06:47:47 GMT

thursday 27th: fly to barranquilla, colombia. stay overnight
friday 28th: bus to maracaibo
28th-january 2: maracaibo
january 2-6: caracas
6-8: two cities along the way to guiria
8th: overnight in guiria
9th: ferry to trinidad, stay overnight
10th: fly home

dumb

Thu, 13 Dec 2007 17:17:44 GMT

*the 2007 survey for the utterly insane with boredom kooks.*
So 2007 is coming to end...
How was this past year for you?:	eh
Did your life change in anyway?:	yeah i guess. i don't talk to half my family now and i'm vegan and i got arrested
Did you fall down any deep holes?:	i think i was depressed last semester.
What did you say that got you in trob;e?:	i dunno
Some in 2007 that made you wet your knickers/pants:	haha um... strange question but a few guys
Did you meet god?:	nah
Glad the spice girls got back toegther?:	don't care either way, but i like the movie
How many times did you lie about what you were doing?:	probably none
What was january to you?:	fun with pog
Did you hit the sales?:	no
Who was your first crush of the year?:	hmmmm... maybe patrick? i hate him now haha
How did you spend the new year?:	salsa dancing
What was febuary like for you?:	snowy
Did you gat any valentines cards?:	from friends
Any celebrity crushes?:	hell no
What about tv, what was you watching in 2007?:	i WAS probably watching crappy tv
How was march for you?:	fun
Did you do anything you wish you had`nt this year, name it.:	procrastinated
Did you meet anyone new.. real life people.:	yeah
And how was april?:	fine
Were you single by now or taken?:	single duh. it's the story of my life
Seen any really great films in 2007?:	paris j'taime or however you spell it
How have you been spending this year?:	being boring
What did may bring?:	summerrrrrr
Any new bands jump up and smack you in the face?:	no but i met a lot
Do you think if you had the chance, you would relive 2007?:	no
And how had june been?:	fine. hopping between pittsburgh and cleveland
Did you talk to any little green men?:	no
Drunk a lot this year?:	actually no
By the middle of the year what was your hair like?:	very very very long
It`s july now.. how is it?:	same
I bet your wondering how much more this has to go..:	eh
Read any good books this year?:	stuff by emma goldman
Ok it`s august now.. what did u get upto?:	shaved my head
Where did you go on holiday?:	no where
Did you get arrested this year?:	yeah
You made it to september, what did you do?:	start school
Wow, i heard a rumour about you.. come spill the truthful ones..:	huh?
Did you tell someone a lie that hurt them?:	no
Did you go to any cool gigs this year?:	yeah, mostly with tim
It`s october now, how was it?:	my birthday
Were you jealous of anyone?:	no
What did u do for halloween?:	dressed up as a cat
November, what happend?:	hung out
Oh my gosh, that was so stupid... (what did u do that made you feel a fool):	got too drunk
Hey, that was mean.. (did you do anything bad to a friend)?:	no
Yay it is now december what are you upto???:	procrastinating
You glad the year is almost up??:	hell. yes.
What are you going to do for christmas?:	hang out with my family and probably get into political arguments with extended members
What are the new year plans?:	going to colombia, venezuela, and trinidad with tim
Do you even care about 2008?:	yeah
Do you think you will have a better year next year?:	yeah for sure
How many chickens crossed the road?:	shut up
Oh my gosh, i just a celebrity.. you seen any this year?:	no
Been to any crazy places?:	no
What are your long term plans for next year?:	lose weight, graduate, move to pittsburgh, do something i love
Wow we are on question 58 and your still here, got anythign to say?:	i hate you
bongs are fun.:	no
So what was your favorite thing to do in 2007?:	buy blankets
What do you want for christmas?:	money for traveling
Do you plan on getting drunk christmas eve?:	oh i guess why not
How about new years eve?:	probably
did you do all you wanted to this year?:	no
OK, WE MADE IT.. HOPE 2008 ROCKS.. SAY ANYTHING U WANT.:	i love falafel
Take this survey \| Find more surveys Bzoink - The Original Survey Site

Thu, 06 Dec 2007 04:53:10 GMT

*((( End of 2007/Start of 2008 )))*
Calendar Year Review…
JANUARY: How did you ring in 2007? Details! Where, who, kiss, etc???:	i was at a bar, salsa dancing with friends from POG, and i kissed all of them on the cheek.
FEBRUARY: Were you in a relationship for Valentine’s Day and what'd you do:	haha no. i don't even remember valentine's day, except we had a snow day at school
MARCH: Did you celebrate St. Patty’s Day by getting drunk?:	yeah, with my crew from caribou.
APRIL: Did you have to walk in the rain (or any month in 07)?:	uh, i dunno?
MAY: Did you fail any classes?:	no but i have an incomplete in one from last semester
JUNE: Did you buy a new swimsuit?:	no, i barely swam
JULY: Did you party on 4th of July?:	haha actually i did, at bill's!
AUGUST: Did you go to the beach?:	nope
SEPTEMBER: Did you start school again?:	no i quit my senior year. sike, yeah.
OCTOBER: What did you dress as for Halloween?:	a cat meowwwwwwww
NOVEMBER: What did you do for Thanksgiving?:	hung out with my family and played boggle with albert
DECEMBER: What do you want/what did you get for Christmas?:	money for venezuela
Personal Reflection
Did you reach your goals for 2007?:	i didn't really have any goals ha
Beside your set goals, what else did you accomplish?:	figured out how to eat right, took time for myself
What is something you learnt about yourself?:	i'm cool on my own
Did you do anything you’d never though you’d never do?:	YES yes yes
In 2007, Did You…
Change your appearance?:	hahaha just a tad. i shaved my head
Move to a new place?:	yeah, i moved from sutowski to campion to pacelli hall
Go to a concert?:	yeah a bunch
Go to a sporting event?:	ummm... i think
Get a new job?:	yes because caribou closed :(
Get a new addition to your family?:	no, how about a subtraction? haha
Gain new friends?:	YES!
Loose old friends?:	kind of, but loose isn't correct here
Get into a fight (verbal or physical)?:	duh
Puke from drinking too much?:	yeah, ew
Travel?:	went to georgia
Go to a wedding?:	no
Go to a funeral?:	yes :(
Go to the hospital?:	no
Have any run-ins with the law?:	haha yeah
Start a relationship?:	no
End a relationship?:	no
Spend over $1000 on something?:	school
Favorite 2007…
Month?:	i dunno, last spring was good
Season?:	fall
Holiday?:	my birthday haha
Memory?:	march 2nd
Party?:	there was a good one last week
Event?:	shaving my head
Club/Bar/Hangout?:	wine bar/grog shop
Moment you laughed so hard that you cried?:	i don't know, that needs to happen more
Movie?:	paris je t'aime
Song?:	anything by rilo kiley
Worst 2007...
Memory?:	dunno
Day at work or school?:	when caribou closed :(
Embarrassing moment?:	hmmm... i don't even know?
Fight/Disagreement/Argument?:	end of august
Pain you felt?:	it's been pretty painless
Person you met?:	dunno
Movie?:	?
Song?:	anything from the riot boys
Place?:	jail
For NYE 07-08…
Where will you be?:	in venezuela
Who will be there?:	tim and me and non-gringos
Do you want to kiss someone at midnight?:	eh, not really
What are you wearing?:	on nye? probably very dirty clothes since i'm only bringin one backpack
In 2008...
What are your goals?:	lose weight, maintain it, stay eating healthy and working out
What do you look forward to?:	SWIMMING in the summer. and graduating. and moving back to pittsburgh
Take this survey \| Find more surveys Bzoink - The Original Survey Site